Living Contract

 

Intended for a variety of situations in which two or more people share living space, or possessions, or relationships.  Adjust the wording to fit your situation, attach the recommended papers and have signatures notarized to be legally binding.  Check with a lawyer in your state to be sure each of these statements are legal in your area.

If you think that having a contract means that you don't trust each other, or that it would ruin your "romantic experience", please think again.  More than half of all marriages fall apart in the first few years, and the courts are overburdened with unnecessary litigation for things that could be resolved simply by discussing them in advance.

This contract helps you think of what to discuss before marriage to ensure success, and if you're already married, might help you fix the problems.

Please also see the discussion in "Are you ready to get married?"

 

You may print this contract for your personal use, but please do not sell or publish the contract or any part of it, without my written permission.  I make no guarantee that this contract is sufficient legal protection in your state, it is up to you to ask your attorney.  I also make no guarantee that this contract will prevent your marriage or relationship from failure or divorce, or prevent violence or attack by one or both parties.

 

 

Partnership Agreement and Disclosure

between

_________________________________________________________&

 

___________________________________________________________

 

We hereby make the following promises to our prospective spouse or significant other, entering into the following contract, and clarifying our relationship with this document.

 

  1. I respect your privacy.  I will not read your mail, enter your purse or wallet without your permission and will not read your emails or files on your computer unless you show them to me yourself.

 

  1. I respect the gifts you have and the purpose to which you were born, recognizing that our gifts and paths are not the same.  I allow you the freedom to honor your developing gifts and pursue your path, regardless of our love for each other, and understand that having different paths does not threaten either of us, and that it is impossible to take anything away from the other.  These are God given gifts and inalienable rights.

 

  1. We will date, cohabitate or enter into various events and situations by mutual consent, both as a whole relationship and concerning any particular event that may present itself.  At any time that an event or the relationship feels uncomfortable, seems like a betrayal of ourselves, or would harm either of us in any way, the agreement for that particular event is suspended upon a clear and honest notice to the other.

 

  1. I will not harm you physically; I will not curse you, scream at you or intimidate you in any way.  I will not belittle you or embarrass you in public or in private.  I will not pressure you to do my will or bidding.  I will not use physical, verbal, emotional or financial abuse against you.  To do so, will void and nullify our contract and relationship.  At such time you are free to go.  (This applies to both or all parties involved and must be understood as an absolute rule that works both ways.)

 

  1. I will respect you when you are on the telephone, and will not interrupt or talk loudly, make noise to hinder your call, or prevent you from doing your business, whether personal or private.  I will allow you to talk with, visit and have over your friends and family, and promise to allow you to have your space and time with the people you care about and realize that it doesn't threaten me in any way.

 

  1. I will leave you and your finances, family and affairs both personal and business, in better shape than when I found you.  I will take nothing from you that you don’t give freely or that I didn’t earn.  Any arbitration shall take place before a clergyman or court of law.  IT WILL NOT be fought out in anger, abuse, threats or police action.  IT WILL NOT turn into harm done against each other in any way.  IF such angers are sparked, we each agree to retreat into separate quarters or rooms, and cool off completely, and will not seek to discuss it or resolve it again without the help of a clergyman or court of law.

 

  1. If our relationship ends, either by choice or by violation of one of these points, neither of us will pursue the other in any violent way, or cause harm or slander against the other.  We agree to part as friends, benevolent to each other and honoring each other and the universe, for the greater good, and our belief in what is right.

 

  1. We recognize that we each hold some ideals and beliefs as sacred, and will make every effort to honor the beliefs and ideals of the other.  It is not necessary to be converted, or to have those same beliefs, but it IS necessary to feel the freedom to carry our own without fear of reprisal or pressure to change.  Any ridicule of these beliefs by either partner, is a serious indication that this relationship is not going to work, and can be deemed harmful to one party, therefore terminates the agreement.

 

  1. We agree to our union for as long as it lasts and that no child or third party will be brought into this union under THIS existing agreement.  Any such pregnancy or partnership with a third, MUST be agreed to and discussed in advance to the best of our ability, in a separate agreement.  IF an accidental pregnancy develops, we stipulate here how that shall be handled and any responsibilities held and incurred by either party.  (may attach separate sheet for instructions)

 

  1. At any time that either of us wishes to end this contract, we agree to supply to the other a statement to that effect, in a timely manner that identifies any possible reason for the breakup.  This is to be done in a way that offers constructive criticism or blessings wished for the partner who is receiving the breakup notice.  It is not a place to strike out or abuse the other.

 

  1. If such a notice of breakup is given, we agree to receive it with dignity and resolve.  We agree that we will honor that request for freedom and let the spouse/ significant other go in peace.  Before parting, it would be very kind if each person would focus on the good points of their partner and let them know what they appreciated about their relationship or specific things done for them, given to them etc. from the relationship.

 

  1. If a breakup is decided upon, a timely and non threatening separation of possessions and assets will be carried out according to the following list of items and their final intended owner.  If additional items are purchased during the time of cohabitation, a new list must be made and dated, filed with this agreement.  If this is not done, then a division of such property in question must be decided in arbitration.  Thirty days shall be the expected time within which these items will be distributed or returned, unless otherwise noted, or if conditions exist that require a different time period.

 

  1. A list of major, or sentimental items and their intended final owners in case of such breakup (or death of one of the partners) shall be filled out and attached to this agreement before signing.  Changes may be made upon mutual consent by adding a new statement, attached to this agreement and dated.  Notary seal on signatures is recommended to avoid court litigation.

 

  1. Pets and living things jointly owned must be recognized as having their own needs and feelings, so they must be jointly owned and allowed visitation rights or shared ownership for the life of the animal, in most cases.  If either party disagrees, state the following below and list who gets the pet if breakup occurs.

 

  1. Financial obligations:  we agree that any debts incurred during the cohabitation are joint responsibility and shall be divided and paid equally or according to arbitrational decision.

 

  1. The decisions concerning who shall pay the bills and budget, who shall work and who shall cook and clean are to be discussed now to avoid any misunderstanding and future argument.  Attach as much information as possible concerning responsibilities and chores on a separate sheet, added to this agreement before signing.

 

17. In case of the death of one or both parties, the instructions for burial, notification of family, division of property and beneficiary status are to be recorded on a separate sheet and added to this agreement.  It is recommended to have wills, living wills or trusts, and life insurance as well, but these things are not covered in this agreement.  This agreement deals only with a simple understanding of the wishes and needs of both parties.

 

  1. Any past financial or moral obligations, taxes, children to support and family needs shall be discussed in detail before signing this agreement.  (Check initials here)  Areas to discuss:  What if previous children come to live with you, or have medical or financial crisis?  What if a close family member dies and has left you as guardian of minor children?  It is strongly recommended that each party signing this agreement first examine the prospective partner’s last 3 years’ tax statements, credit report, have a criminal background check done and meet the close family members of their partners, so that no surprises or problems will arise from the past.

 

  1. I certify to my partner(s) or spouse that I am free from all disease to the best of my knowledge, and I promise to remain faithful and monogamous to him/her during our stay together.  If this is not the desired relationship, the correct intention is stated below or on separate sheet.  For the safety of my prospective spouse/significant other, I attach here a statement of my health, with the date of my last STD tests.  This statement must come from a medical authority, and be attached before signing.  Any violation of this promise to be faithful voids and cancels this agreement and the other partner is free to go.  Discuss hereditary and genetic disorders or diseases and how they may affect plans to have children later.

 

  1. Attachments included with this document are:

  

Statements of

 

Number 9:    decision regarding unexpected pregnancy

Number 13:  disposal of possessions

Number 14:  sharing of pets upon breakup

Number 16:  decisions of who works, who cleans and cooks etc.

Number 17:  in event of death, wishes for funeral and possessions

Number 19:  statement of health

 

 

 

 

Signed by ______________________________________________________________

  

 

 

And  ___________________________________________________________________

 

 

Date:  _________________________________________

 

 

 

 

Notary Signature: _________________________________________________________

 

 

My Commission Expires: ______________________________________________

 

 

Print Notary Name and Address:

 

 

 

 

 

Notary Seal

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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